From Radio Intelligence

How PPM is changing music radio stations

Memo to all radio managers around the world – Get prepared for PPM, it’s going to change your business, writes Sam Zniber and Emmanuel Legrand.

When PPM (Portable People Meter) technology was introduced in the Philadelphia market by Arbitron in 2006, it changed forever US radio and the way executives and advertisers were going to use the medium.

Rather than asking listeners which stations they tune to, with the old diary model, the system only requires listeners to be passive and carry a device that picks up signals with embedded information that can be identified.

As any radio executive who has been living with the technology can attest, it’s not simply an audience measurement tool. There is more to it.

HAPPY HALLOWEEN FROM CHUCK AND JESSICA AT FTC

FIRST LISTEN - JAY COFFEY KKGO LOS ANGELES

Veteran Los Angeles air talent Jay Coffey is new to mornings on Saul Levine's KKGO (Go Country 105). He replaces Shawn Parr who left a few months ago. Teamed with Ginny Harman, the new show works within the confines of the PPM world delivering short imaging, music and music contesting, with long breaks after information in stop-sets. Enjoy FTC'S FIRST EAR on Go Country 105's Jay Coffey. 

Jay Coffey KKGO 3:45

JAY COFFEY jay@gocountry105.com Jay Coffey joins Go Country 105 in the mornings from 6am – 10am with co-host Ginny Harmon. Jay Coffey first arrived in Los Angles in 1977 to work at Bill Drake’s K100. After making it to the number one spot and 8 years in afternoons, Jay moved to 93/KHJ in 1985.  After only 4 months Jay was transferred to KHJ’s sister station K-EARTH 101 where he would spend the next 20 years working on one of the most successful Oldies stations in America. In 2002 Jay was promoted to program director of K-EARTH 101 and was nominated program director of the year in 2003.

GINNY HARMAN ginny@gocountry105.com Longtime country radio personality Ginny Harman can be heard weekday mornings from 6am to 10am. For decades Ginny has honed her skills at stations across America – from Milwaukee to Nashville and Cleveland to Phoenix. She has over 25 years of voiceover, acting and broadcasting experience, and having been associated with over a dozen charities, Ginny is also passionate about being directly involved with the local community. In her spare time she enjoys riding her Harley, doing Theater and hanging with her cats.

There's No Place Like Social Media!

by Jessica Northey
In honor of Halloween, on this Finger Candy Friday, I offer a story:

Once upon a time there was a girl, and her dog. They lived somewhere….under the sun, and lots of it!
She was a friendly, ambitious, creative SocialMediologist….and the fairest maid in all the land (ummm it’s my story.)  She dreamt about one day helping people while working with Entertainers and hoped to make the world a better place…..one tweet at a time ;)

On a serious note, I was watching the “The Wizard of Oz” the other day and thought , “what can I learn from this movie that I can apply to my life and how I use Social Media?”

In the story, Dorothy is knocked unconscious during a tornado. She, her dog and the farmhouse are swept up in the storm and dropped into the magical Land of Oz, where she sets out on the yellow brick road to the Emerald City to ask the Wizard of Oz to return her to Kansas. During her journey, she meets a Scarecrow, a Tin Man and a Lion, who join her, hoping to receive what they lack themselves. They are pursued by the Wicked Witch of the West, who wants her dead sister's magic ruby slippers, now worn by Dorothy.

FTC FIRST EAR - KXLW ANCHORAGE

Meet Alaska's Real Country 96.3 THE WOLF. The station recently morphed into a gold-based CMR station and from the get-go, it sounds great. This could be a real format in a PPM market. Other formats mix old songs and new songs, Country has always rebuffed the idea of two music genres being represented. Last weekend, I listened to KGGI Riverside-San Bernardino and they played War, Earth Wind and Fire, Naughty By Nature and currents with normal R/CHR power gold and it sounded great.

HEAR THE WOLF HERE (5:00 AUDIO COMPOSITE)

Saturday, our FIRST EAR continues with KKGO's Jay Coffey.

Think about it Thursday (What do Pop and Country have in common?)

There is a changing of the guard at both Pop radio and CMR. New faces, new styles and sounds. 

POP

IN

Bruno Mars

Far East Movement

Taio Cruz

B.O.B

Drake

Cee Low Green

Nicky Minaj

OUT

Kelly Clarkson

Gwen Stefani

Greenday

Coldplay

Pink

Madonna

Justin Timberlake

COUNTRY

IN

The Band Perry

Easton Corbin

Miranda Lambert

Zac Brown Band

Lady Antebellum

Chris Young

Taylor Swift

Carrie Underwood

OUT

Toby Keith

Tim McGraw

Montgomery Gentry

Brooks and Dunn

Alan Jackson

Taylor Swift'

Garth Brooks

Are you PPM'ed up?

No need to write down
Country 107.1

Thanks to CSI and LA LAW, we now have the term: Lawyer'ed up. Paul Wilson and I were talking the other day and we both used the term PPM'ed up. He is a big LA LAW fan and available for programming and dance parties at a cluster near you. That made me think - Which causes the gears to grind, are you PPM'ed up? Exactly what does that mean?

JR Shumann is a community builder!

JR is all smiles

Our friend JR Shumann of KYKX Longview, TX is certainly a community builder in the highest degree. Let me turn it over to him for the what he accomplished this past weekend:

Hey Chuck!

Thanks so much for asking about my walk!

We had the walk over the weekend in Dallas…despite the bad weather…it was a huge success! We had over 600 people participate, and so far, we’ve raised almost $70,000 for the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention! 

Is there anyone in the studio? Yes it appears so

Which is better than RADIO DEAD

On a jaunt to San Diego Sunday to accompany my father in law back to Fresno for home health care, I did some grand listening to radio on the way down and back. it appears in markets of all sizes, Bakersfield #75 to Los Angeles #2, there are live bodies on the air on a Sunday. Yes pinch us we must be dreaming!

The disconnect is with the audience, not the music!

I have read everything Sean Ross has written in the many years he has been at the forefront of trade journal communications. In his recent ROSS ON RADIO on the popular RADIO-INFO site, he recently wrote about a disconnect with morning shows and music, then all day parts and music. My personal belief in Country Music Radio, there is too much of a music connection. I have always felt the talent talk about mundane music information way too much. I have never been a fan of the morning show focusing on longer than T&A breaks as part of their back sells in mornings. Long music breaks are a lazy way for CMR morning shows to get through a break. 

Saturday Catch Up with Jerry Del Colliano

Ask JD: “I lost my job, what are my media options now?”
Saturday, October 23, 2010
By Jerry Del Colliano

There are many people who have been laid off or fired from jobs they love in radio and the media business. I often get the question, how do I stay in the business doing something that has some upside growth potential.

This weekend, I have 5 idea starters for you. Things you can do for little or no money – with or without partners that can be revenue positive. All you need is a computer, a work ethic and the experience you bring from traditional media.

From the Real World to the Rural World, Social Media and Politics

Sean Duffy's campaign has received much National attention especially after being endorsed by Governor Sarah Palin and Governor Tim Pawlenty. Often called the “next Scott Brown.” and recently named to "Time Magazine's 40 Under 40 . The National Republican Congressional Committee thinks highly enough of Duffy’s campaign that is has included him as one of 22 “contenders” in its “Young Guns” candidate recruitment program. In addition, even though his district is rural and spread apart to the tune of many hours of driving around, Sean is running a fantastic grass roots campaign and Social Media has had a big part in it!

Taking a Closer Look at the Duffy for Congress Campaign's use of Social Media

S*%$ my air talent have said!

The new television show and the Twitter site, S*&$ my Dad says, made me think of some of the craziest stuff I have heard on my stations from the air talent. Most come from WCTO Allentown, because it was dripping in personality.

Wild Joe Tyler WCTO after playing WRITE THIS DOWN for six months as a power says: "George the lead in the pencil has been worn down to nothing:."

Shaun O'Brian WCTO in a scuffle with a listener on the air over having too much fun: "I don't come down to CVS where you work and tell you how to stock shelves."

Don Hall at KZSN Wichita to Brad and Cathy (Co-hosts): "You both are killing me, this should be so easy."

Me as Uncle Buck at WCTO after playing NO ONE ELSE ON EARTH "Wynonna, not Winona, not the shop lifter, the only thing Wynonna ever stole was a leg of lamb."

Bobby Knight at WCTO after playing Toby Keith: "I'm not saying Toby Keith is a big dumb ape, but it's true he has a new song out (into Magilla Gorilla theme). 

Athena Matsikas at KHGE Fresno relating  market manager Jeff Negrete to Kevin Metheny at W-N-BC. "He's just like pig vomit, every time we try to do good radio, he finds fault with it.

The un-conventional convention!

There was a news talk radio convention in Los Angeles this past weekend and a good friend of mine was there and said it was almost out of control with programmers and vendors clashing in presentations and panels. Arbitron getting the brunt of the hecklers. Questions were posed to the Arbitron folks like "Why are you sampling 6 year olds", "Why are the same people on panels for years, if they don't listen to my station now, they won't in a year." My favorite "The sample size is still too low and the panel isn't refreshed enough."

While one popular consultant was speaking, programmers were over heard saying things like "1980 called and want's it's radio station back." Is this the tone for future conventions or will they still emerge as radio and records ass kissing conventions? With CRS coming up in early 2011, will someone ask these tough questions. Stop the disconnect between vendors, labels and radio stations. Radio's job is tough and these vendors don't seem to get it.

Randy and the gang back in broadcasting!

Kevin Carter's RAMP said today that Randy might be gone at the end of the week. From today's RAMP:

"The Chicago Tribune, reported that Michaels has decided to resign as CEO sometime before the end of this week, according to those famous and murky "sources close to the situation." Rather than just slide someone new into the CEO chair, theTribune hears that Michaels will be replaced by a four-member Office of the President: Eddy Hartenstein, President/Publisher ofThe Los Angeles Times; Tony Hunter, President/Publisher of the Chicago Tribune Media Group; Tribune Chief Investment OfficerNils Larsen; and Don Liebentritt, Tribune's Chief Restructuring Officer."

Tom Taylor says at Radio-Info that he made it through the meeting yesterday and is still Tribune's CEO. Why all this hoopla, this is the biggest news in radio, television and print media? What if Randy says the hell with it and this group goes back to radio? What a team. 

Sean Compton, Lee Abrams, Jeff Kapugi, Carolyn Gilbert, Leigh Jacobs, Mark Chase, Kevin Metheny and more. These are players. This would be a great group. Now I know Wilson and his Portland crew didn't exactly set off fireworks over the Columbia River with Alpha. The creative process without the muddle of the administrative process was Randy's way at Jacor and for a cup of coffee at Clear Channel. This would be a welcome team back to the creative process in radio. 

Lee Letter from All Access

"I believe it is important to state the facts as they apply to my recent and abrupt departure from TRIBUNE COMPANY. My apology for sending THE ONION NEWS NETWORK parody clip stands. Though, as TRIBUNE is a multi-media company competing at the most dramatic crossroads in media history, I would have hoped that the use of a brilliant parody to demonstrate the ills of popular TV would have been an effective communicationvehicle and that people would have taken it as it was intended; a parody that illustrates what not to do. I suspect that a major component of this debacle is being motivated by a power play to seize creative, cultural and business control of the company as it emerges from Chapter 11. Or maybe the idea of a 'rock and roll' type from broadcasting invading tradition is so offensive to the fourth estate that my mere presence posed a threat to their grip on the past. I do not know that any of these hypotheses are fact and probably never will.

"I do find it ironic that THE ONION is a business partner of THE CHICAGO TRIBUNE and that very clip was shown at a recent CHICAGO TRIBUNE sales meeting to a rousing and positive reaction. This leads me to suspect that the clip itself was not the motivation behind the aggressive coverage this event received. Personally, I think THE CHICAGO TRIBUNE has worked hard to reinvent itself as a modern newspaper serving CHICAGOLAND and I hope I played a small role in helping them achieve what they have done in a short period of time. I hold up copies of this newspaper with pride, and in fairness I want them to know that.

"It saddens me that in light of the remarkable challenges that old media faces, there would be such an uproar over this clip. I am sorry for the timing and the results of my action, but continue to believe that people working in traditional media needs to open their eyes to the realities of our culture in 2010 without denial, self-righteousness or arrogance. It was my intention to use any reasonable vehicle to help that happen. I would hope more people would look at the actual memo in context and note that it included several ONION parodies, TED Conference speeches, socialmedia videos and creative presentations. TV understands this, online reinvents itself by the minute and I was hopeful that print would have the same attitude. While some do, many are more resistant than I ever suspected. My biggest mistake may have been a failure to temper my style to the culture of print newsrooms, as clearly, there has been a contentious attitude between us from the day I walked in. After decades of work in radio, music and popular culture, I should have known better. But I hope those who find my approach unusual will know that my intentions have never been anything more than to push new thinking in all of our media. We are in the APPLE era and need to open our eyes to change even when it's not pretty. The TRIBUNE TV stations are engaging with that idea and will be stronger for their efforts. There are a few ongoing issues I read about that I need to address: 

* That I did not know a print reporter was reporting from, say, IRAQ. My point was that on a CNNor FOX you will see the reporter in the war environment whereas, in print, if the story is often only recognized by a simple byline, and average readers may not assume that there is actually someone on the ground. As a result it resonates as a generic story, rather than one reported from a war zone.

* I involved myself in editorial decisions. I have no expertise in print journalism and focused solely on the creative and marketing side with hopes that newspapers could re-energize themselves to meet the conditions of 2010. As an FYI, I distributed the ratings of FOX NEWS to illustrate an opinion trend, and received several dozen angry phone calls, though the ratings were geared as a piece of information and not a directive.

* That I was involved in downsizing. I understand the economic realities of today, but those decisions are made by publishers, managers and the many people at TRIBUNE with financial backgrounds.

* That I created a hostile and sexist environment. This is depressing if not insulting. I could only hope people who felt this way would ask anyone who I directly worked with at TRIBUNE, SIRIUS-XM or anywhere else. I live my life to be respectful, honest, positive, optimistic and fair. There are those who don't believe that, and again, the only recourse I have is for anyone who doubts that to speak to anyone I have directly worked with or for at any point in my career.

* That I was part of some ex-CLEAR CHANNEL boys club. I have never worked for CLEAR CHANNEL. I have known and competed against RANDY MICHAELS for decades, but most of the other CLEAR CHANNEL people at TRIBUNE I had never met prior to arriving here. In my opinion, once you walk through the doors of TRIBUNE Tower, you are a TRIBUNE employee and your past is not an issue as long as you do good work. I have seen only good work from these folks. I do look at myself as an outspoken, driven and perhaps rebellious type and if that's a problem in the world of helping re-invent media, then so be it.

I want to go on record that I hope for nothing but success for everyone at TRIBUNE and that includes some of the newspaper people that I can't help thinking were focused on undermining my work and accelerating my decline at the company instead of moving us to the future. I just hope that no one will get mired in the drama and instead focus on the spirit of positive change that has never been more important in the battle for eyes, ears and minds in this 21st Century. I will not stop pushing forward at wherever my next venture may be."

Thank you.

What about Randy?

Today's big news is Tribune Companies will ask for Randy Michaels resignation as CEO of the company. Radio-Info says this might have a cascading effect with more of the gang leaving with Randy. I have a few friends that went to work with Randy and they love working there and bringing a new motif to the print industry. 

They days of trying to reproduce magic in radio with a group of rag tag radiophiles is over. The business has changed too much, the connection and spark with the audience and customers is gone. Buzz Bennett, Bill Drake, Les Garland, Gerry Cagle, Guy Zapoleon and more magic makers would have a tough time getting anyone to care. Sorry I didn't hear the New KCBQ sign-on, I was listening to every song from The Byrds on Pandora while texting friends overseas. 

I think Randy is a great radio person who was a fish out of water in the print world, I know I was working at The Fresno Bee. It's a change in what you're use to. There is little to zero creativity in print. The business model is older than I am. Maybe Randy was just trying to put some fun in the mix and it didn't happen. 

Is your radio station a frat house?

Lee Abrams and Randy Michaels according to Jerry Del Colliano today were sparring partners in the battle of who would take the fall for bad taste inside the electronic world of Tribune. Jerry also says today, which is true

"Because this kind of mismanagement is going on in other media companies. And you don’t want to be unwittingly contributing to your own downfall". 

Radio has become this business void of real policies and procedures. When Randy was the CEO of Jacor, he didn't want an HR handbook, because he didn't want a list of what you could and could not do. Real companies and businesses operate from a total spectrum human resources standpoint. I have worked for a major newspaper company for over a year, McClatchy and it was not like Tribune in anyway, shape or form. It was buttoned up and zipped up tight.

Sure these right brain managers believe that the creative and artistic freedom is crunched when you have all of these rules and policies and the workplace becomes vanilla. That is bull ding from the get go. What does inappropriate behavior in any way shape or form have to do with the creative platform inside radio stations?

Still, too many radio stations have frat house atmospheres. Managers either turn the other cheek or are so focused on the sales vistas, they don't see it. It's this kind of loose environment that leads to trouble. The last thing you want to do is end up in a deposition answering questions about the "loose attitude" of the radio station. Talk to your staff, talk to management and if you lean even a tad blue, clean it up. If you take a clear, large tank of water and add even a tinge of blue, the whole tank takes on a blue hue. 

Be known for what you live for, creative, passionate and dedicated radio without the excess baggage. 

Sunday Driving on Full Throttle County with Tomorrow's Country Star Chelsea Rae!

I spent last week in Nashville, every where I went everyone I met did something in Country Music. It was a very neat experience for me.

One of the highlights of my trip was meeting up and coming, "Rising Country Music Star Chelsea Rae."
Humble, talented, brave and possessing every quality in person you want to see succeed.

Since before she was born into this world music has been influencing Chelsea Rae. Her mother attended a Judds concert when she was six months along with her and as the story goes over the years, it has been said that she could feel her kicking along to the rhythm of Kentucky duo

Over the past two years of living in Nashville, Rae has been quick to blaze her own trail with the likes of Nashville's finest including co-writting sessions Walker Hayes (Capitol recording artist), Bo Bice (Former Idol runner-up) and Bridgette Tatum (Co-wrote 2009's most spun song "She's Country"). In the spring or 2009 Rae released her debut EP, "Justice," in memory of fallen classmate and inspiration, Justice Fockler. The five song album gave listeners a sneak peak into Rae's country roots and spit fire attitude with lyrics like "Don't come cryin' to me I see you shakin' in your boots," and"Ask your neighbor for a dollar to cut the grass come Sunday me and dad we were catchin' bass..." Currently Chelsea is in the studio recording her sophomore EP, "Ember," Rae says, "I feel like this stuff is even more me then the first record if that's possible, it's a little more edgy I really look forward to everyone giving it a listen."
 

Where are you answering these questions from?

Nashville,TN

What are you wearing?

A hoodie and shorts

How did you get started in Music?

I was 13 which was when the first season of American Idol came out and I had grown up listening to a lot of music but never really thought of it as a career choice until my best friend at the time claimed I had a good voice. I took an interest and started writing songs it was one of those synergistic divine intervention things I think… which progressed into singing in choirs, talent shows and picking up the guitar.

What are 3 items you CAN NOT live without?

iPhone, iPhone charger, Sunglasses

Favorite item of clothing/jewelry/accessory? Why?

I LOVE shoes especially boots I think they are comfortable and add a country/rock element to your outfit…My favorite piece of jewelry is a bracelet I made out of a guitar string that broke after I played at my friend Justice’s funeral he was a huge inspiration to me actually his song is the title track to my debut EP I wrote with Walker Hayes here in town…I LOVE sunglasses if I could, I’d have like 500 pairs same with boots you can’t have enough!

Have you ever been in a fight? Describe.

No it’d be fun though ha!

What is the first thing you think of when you wake up in the morning?

Usually  a mix between I’m tired and right on I can’t wait to see what happens…

What kind(s) of car do you drive?

Ford Focus who actually wishes it was an ’76 Ford Highboy with 36’s and an extra 6 inch lift, just sayin’...

Is there anything that you regret?

No because without every experience, good, bad or otherwise I wouldn't have the knowledge I do now.

What are your fondest childhood memories? In your house? In your neighborhood or town?

Fishing with my dad on the Santiam River in Oregon and playing baseball with all the boys.

What current event has your eyes and ears? And what are you doing about it?

Recently for me it’s been about the flood and what I can do to volunteer or raise awareness for helpful opportunities for those effected or playing at benefits.

How do you use Social Media in your industry for productivity?

I use it to keep my fans/friends in touch with what’s going on with me. I also like to use it to keep people positive or informed about what’s happening in the community.

What is your favorite website?

Probably Facebook or Twitter I LOVE being social so that’s where I spend a lot of my “web-time”.

If you had a Super Power what would it be?

Flight all the way!

Which famous people do you admire? Why?

I’d admire Kelly Clarkson because, she is such a strong woman who always fights for what she wants and has thee BEST voice it’s got soul man and killer writing skills and to top it all off she’s super down to earth, Wynonna is another very strong very soulful talented chick who also has had to overcome many battles in life to get to where she is today, P!NK because she doesn’t worry about what other people think or if she’s going to fail at something she really lives out loud and that is something I always try to achieve. Even though Taylor Swift and I are so close in age I admire her classiness and songwriting talent. I just really look up to hardworking, talented vocalist/songwriters who have no fear of what someone might think of them.

What is your favorite movie? Why

8 Seconds because I LOVE rodeo especially bullriding and I love Lane Frost and what a free spirit he was and let’s be honest Luke Perry in Wranglers is a great site!

Favorite snack? Why?

Cereal I just crave it all the time and I like it when it gets soggy no idea why ha!

How do you balance your work with other obligations - mate, children, hobbies?

Can’t say I really do I think if one feels out of control I’ll offer more attention to something else until it feels right it’s a vicious cycle.

Do you get nervous before you perform?

Kind of, it also depends on what the event is, I’m always more apt to get nervous if someone that I’m close with is there and I find them talented.

Do you have a ritual before you perform?

Drink water and Gatorade, listen to my "Show Jamz," mix on my iPod and give all my buddies a pound.

If you could meet anyone in the world dead or alive who would it be, and what would say to them?

Calamity Jane and I’d ask her if we could go raise some cane.

What is your hobby or do you collect anything? Why?

Koozies, I donno they always have funny stuff on them the actual funny part is that I never use them...I collect hats you just can't have too many camo hats! I of course collect music I love buying CD’s still because I love having the tangible artwork and lyrics.

What chore to you hate? Why?

I hate house work in general but I think I especially hate cleaning the bathroom because I’m germaphobic and I can’t stand being around all the bathroom ick!

Do you have an animal/s? What kind/s? Names?

My Mom and I share a cat named Simba but she’s more hers then mine. When I have a truck I want to get a male blue heeler and name him Coors I grew up with two heelers and they were fun.

Fruits or Vegetables?

Both but fruit ha!

Mac or PC?

Have a PC jonesin’ for a Mac!

Ginger or Mary Ann? Which are you more like?

I was super young when this came out and I don’t watch a lot of TV now but when I was young my dad called my Giligan…

Craziest thing you have ever done?

Skinny dipped in the day light;)

Chelsea Rae
www.myspace.com/chelsearaesongs
www.twitter.com/chelsearaesongs
www.facebook.com/chelsearaesongs

Saturday Catch Up with Sean Ross from Radio-Info

(Bleep) My GM Says

Anybody in radio has acquired a collection of quotes from their general managers over the years. If they were handed down by a great GM, they remain inspiring or motivating throughout a career. And even if they’re not any of those, they still probably provide some ongoing amusement.

We asked PDs in the “25+” audience for the best “stuff their GMs said”—positive or negative, quotes that inspired a staff to perform or just inspired a staff to start job hunting. In many cases here, the GMs are anonymous, for obvious reasons, but it’s safe to assume that any less-than-inspiring quotes come from previous PDs. And, in some cases, the PDs are anonymous as well. Any attribution here is "as recalled by" the PD who submitted the story.

INSPIRING

 “Have a commitment to excellence—every time you open the mic, every time you go on a sales call, every time you greet somebody.” – Morgan Prue, APD/MD WLTW (Lite 106.7) New York remembers her WYNF Tampa, Fla., GM Shawn Portmann.

“When discussing strategy, my GM, Jim Principi, always says ‘well, ready, fire, aim. What I’d do is ___.’ I love this phrase and now I use it all the time as well.” – Brad Savage WCNR, Charlottesville, Va.

“This too shall pass.” – Barb Richards, WAJI (Majic 95.1) Fort Wayne, Ind., recounts Lee Tobin's advice for tough times.

“First we’ll be best. Then we’ll be first.” – Former Pamal/Albany regional VP of programming, Kevin Callahan, now the newly named PD of KSON San Diego

“Work off [of] people’s strengths.” – Leslie Fram, WRXP New York, recalling “the late great Bill Phippen at WAPW (Power 99) Atlanta and a mantra that holds true for current GM Alex Cameron as well.

“You can’t teach give a s---t.” – R.W. Smith, recalling GM Dale Weber at WIXY Champaign, Ill.

“Truth is you never know, so why not try?” – Kevin Callahan

NOT SO INSPIRING

“The fall book starts today. Don’t f--- it up.” – Jon Zellner, Senior VP/Programming, Clear Channel

“Any monkey can do what you do.” – Anonymous PD who was told this on taking their station to No. 1 25-54. The PD did have the presence of mind to come back with, “Maybe so, but how come I’m the only monkey who’s done it?”

“I would normally never ask this, but I promise you it’s a one-time deal and I’ll never ask this for another client.” – Clear Channel/Akron, Ohio, PD Keith Kennedy, who attributes this to “every GM I’ve ever worked for.”

“Do you have any good ideals for this promotion.” “It’s veryflustrating isn’t it?” – Anonymous

HELPFUL PROGRAMMING ADVICE

“I’m the best programming General Manager in the business.” – Anonymous

“Really? My wife loves that song.” – Dave Symonds, Clear Channel/Richmond, Va.

“Why are we playing sleepers like Boyz II Men or Luther Vandross at the top of the hour where we should be playing an uptempo burner?” – Rick Thomas, Director of Programming, Ohana Broadcasting/Honolulu recalls a former GM

“We must stop playing the song where they are killing a horse.” – Rick Thomas, remembering another former GM’s response to what turned out to be House Of Pain’s “Jump Around.”

"We shouldn't be playing that song about 'going down to do Ms. Walker." -- Former WDAF Kansas City morning host Darren Wilhite remembers the GM who objected to the Kentucky Headhunters' "Dumas Walker."

BARBED

“Why? Why? Why does your morning show hurt me every day.” – Jon Zellner

“Would you like some cheese to go with that whine?” – Anonymous PD

“If you want sympathy, it’s between shit and syphilis in the dictionary.” – Callahan, whose GM’s “quit your complaining” speech was even more direct.

“Once you put someone in the bastard column, never take them out of the bastard column.” -- Anonymous

“If we’re not Top 5 25-54, I’ll cut your d--- off and use it for a doorstop.” – An PD who decided to take it as an anatomical compliment that his GM would see this as physically plausible.

FINANCIAL

“Money in the door cures all ills.” – Steve Clem

“What do you want? You’re already making more money than me.” – Brian Carter

“That’s a money spending idea. Somebody bring me a money-making idea.” – Anonymous

“The more money you make, the bigger the target on your head come budget time.” – Anonymous, whose GM was only thinking of his PD’s well-being by not paying more.

“You are an important part of this show. You are the parsley beside a big steak dinner.” – Anonymous, whose boss was trying to explain why his raise would be proportionate to that of a garnish.

“Great job this week! Write down half your hours.” -- Anonymous

“I deserve this raise!” – A PD recalls a GM banging their fist on the table during a budget meeting on why that company-wide spending freeze shouldn’t apply. “I was excused from the meeting shortly thereafter,” the PD recalls.

“I don’t want a people stealing Band-Aids.” – PD whose GM was explaining why there was no first-aid kit, even though an employee had been injured on the way to work.

“Disc jockeys are worth minimum wage and all the records they can steal.” – Bill Clary

“If the jocks can’t eat it or f---- it, they’ll break it.” – Anonymous

How about (bleep) that your GM said? Comment here or e-mail rossonradio@in3media.com

About the Writer

Sean Ross, one of the radio and music industry’s most widely respected writers and programming analysts, is the author of the newsletter Ross On Radio, an extension of his long-running column of the same name. Ross is a veteran trade journalist, whose background includesBillboard, Radio & Records, Airplay Monitor, and M Street Journal. Since 2003, he has been VP of music and programming at Edison Research, a leading radio industry vendor, and has continued in that capacity since joining Radio-Info.com in 2009. He has also programmed R&B Oldies WGCI-AM Chicago, written many liner notes for Oldies compilation projects, and is a consultant to the radio and music industries.